How To Ruin Any Childhood

A couple of weeks ago you might remember the post about why you should be scared of clowns and the many reasons that make them so damn creepy. Well, thanks to Dominic Deville, I have found yet another reason you should fear grown men with rainbow pants. Deville is the worst kind of clown… he’s a party clown. You know, the kind where your parents think you would enjoy seeing a grown ass man with make-up that juggles in front of you for a couple of hours on your birthday. The special thing about Deville though is that he’s not just a party clown service, he’s an “Evil Clown” service and juggling is definitely NOT on the menu.

How does it work? Well, he starts by giving your child nightmares for about a week leading up to their birthday by stalking them every day for seven days and leaving them creepy notes and text messages. So after a long nightmare filled week of being stalked by a clown, when it is finally the child’s birthday which is perhaps the one day that might make him forget about his new stalker, Deville shows up and smashes the kids cake right into his face most likely causing said kid to shit himself in front of all of his friends. After all of that, congratulations you just created a serial killer.

So if you are interested in being a terrible parent (or an awesome one) and you happen to live in Lucerne, Switzerland, give Deville a call and enjoy having your child stand over your bed with a butcher knife while you sleep.

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If you are ever attacked by a gorilla just sit back and relax while you enjoy the once in a life time feeling of your limbs being ripped off.

8 thoughts on “How To Ruin Any Childhood

  1. HAHA! Dude, I love your posts. This one hit home, too. Every year my wife and I put on a full-blown maze for Halloween in which, she plays a clown. Well, kinda. She wears a straight jacket and this mask that looks like she cut someones face off then painted that to look like a clown. I use a chainsaw in the maze and she gets more screams then I do.
    That’s our maze’s youtube page.

    1. Holy crap those videos are awesome! The sweet sound of people screaming on Halloween, it doesn’t get much better than that. Thanks for keeping the Halloween spirit alive, it’s hard to find people who really care about it anymore!

      1. Thanks for checking them out. My wife and I are huge on the holiday. We’ve been to around 80 mazes in the past 7 years, looking to see what we can do. We want to go big and commercial, but it’s gonna be a few years.

  2. What does it say about me, a guy who does not like clowns, but who thinks that Deville is freaking awesome?

    1. Hahah I totally understand! I think it is no doubt a perfect way to ruin a kids life, but Deville is a badass and this is totally awesome! Also last name “Deville”…. creepy!

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