Here’s the thing about a lot of horror fans – they’re the worst. Look… that’s harsh, I know, but hear me out. Because this genre has such a passionate fan base, when they get upset about something — like when their favorite childhood horror movie gets remade — they’re going to let you and everyone else know. Every. Single. Time. Despite countless examples of great remakes, with every new announcement their numbers grow stronger and their irrational whining gets louder. Remakes are not, and have never been, the end of the world… unless you’re these guys.
As predicted, once the news dropped that a Twister remake is now on the horizon — potentially to be directed by Top Gun: Maverick‘s Joseph Kosinski — some horror fans couldn’t wait to let everyone know how bad of an idea it is. Now, what’s immediately hilarious to me about this is the fact that… Twister isn’t even a horror movie. Thriller, sure. But horror movie? The closest this movie gets to horror is a brief shot of The Shining playing at a drive-in, but do you think that stopped some horror fans from getting extremely butt-hurt on the internet? No… oh no. Let’s examine, shall we?
Oh.. look, this guy used a pun to be silly and an asshole. Hey, don’t do that. And also, what do you even mean by more “bad reboots”? The Invisible Man came out 5 months ago and — this might be shocking to you — it was decidedly better than your pun.
Okay, there’s a lot to unpack here. So much so that I… I don’t even know where to begin. Adri, you can’t possibly believe that a remake of Twister — a movie about tornadoes in rural who-the-fuck-knows — will actually disgrace their memories in any capacity. If anything, this will encourage more people to watch the original film and see their wonderful performances. So far, from what I can tell, the only disgrace this remake has caused is this comment you just made. You’re an insane person.
I like that this guy just gets straight to the point. And I also like that a real-life psychic has the time to post thoughtful comments about remakes of movies made in the 90’s. Bro, tell me my future.
Who wants to break the news to him? Hey, guy, I’m sorry to be the one who has to tell you this but… but they didn’t use real tornadoes in Twister. That wasn’t a real cow either. I know all of the real tornadoes are out of work right now due to COVID-19, but that doesn’t mean doing it with CGI is a bad thing. In fact, you could argue that with today’s movie technology, CGI is — without a shred doubt — the only way to make this movie, you silly man.
Oh, look. We got another pun bro here. He even italicized it to make sure nobody missed it. Nothing sucks more than this type of dude. Really makes your head spin…
Please, Jasonlives1986, explain to the rest of us which remakes are necessary so that we know which ones to bitch about in advance next time. I like how this dude draws the line at remakes — only the unnecessary ones — but is totally cool with a horror franchise that shits out sequel after sequel for 30 years and only stopped because of rights issues. You can’t complain about remakes and be a fan of a franchise that basically remakes itself with every sequel.
I had to cap this off at six because there’s just… so many of them. I was sifting through the shitstorm that is the comments on Twitter, too, and… oh, boy; there’s just not enough time in the day to corral them all. It always cracks me up to read the comments section on horror sites because they’re always, without fail, full of troglodytes complaining about things they haven’t even seen yet. Anyway, this post is brought to you by boredom, so hopefully you found this, at the very least, mildly entertaining.
Also, if you made it this far (thanks!) – show your support (I do this shit for free for god sakes) by following on Twitter.
themissingreel.com 
Hilarious post dude.
Fuck the trolls. At first I saw this and was like, you’ve gotta be kidding me. Twister now?? But you’re right. A remake gives new audiences the chance to go back and see the original (which in all likelihood will be far and away superior). There’s room for an update. Because at the very least, fuck people you also have the option to NOT WATCH. 8)
You nailed it. It’s the confidence some people have to complain about a movie they haven’t even seen (and won’t see for a while) is what makes these comments hilarious. And you’re right. Just don’t watch the damn thing if you’re bothered THAT much by it, you know. Imagine if the directors who make these remakes had that same mentality – The Fly & The Thing wouldn’t exist (among many, many more).
I don’t think a Twister remake is a completely horrible idea. It could be a decent film.
Hahaha nice post Ryan! Yep. It can get testy, that’s for sure. I’m wary when reboots are announced, but will usually check them out. That being said, some really are just that awful and then I have regrets for sitting through it!
You’re absolutely right and that can be said for any movie, which is why I always find it funny that some people get so upset about remakes. If it’s awesome, great!
Great read! The part about CGI had me cracking up, haha. I do wholly admit – I am usually skeptical when I hear about a new remake or reboot in the works. It’s pure gut-reaction, and definitely unfounded in some cases. In fact, I think it can be quite risky to take on the behemoth that is nostalgia, and the strong feelings these films elicited in many very young first-time viewers. BUT, some classics could benefit from the modern treatment to become even more badass and gnarly; Event Horizon, anyone?
Event Horizon would be sick! I totally agree on remakes. It’s obviously tough for movies to compare to their original counterpart, but ultimately if you get a great movie out of it then it’s totally worth it. Look at EVIL DEAD among many others. There are too many great examples of good remakes to dismiss them immediately at this point.